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Jason Tandro
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PostJason Tandro Posted: Sat Mar 07, 2009 5:00 pm   Post subject: Comic's Corner Reply with quote

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Okay people, here it is. A Terra-Earth joke contest. Whip out your funniest jokes and tell them here. One at a time, please!

I'll start with a personal favorite:

A man comes home to see his wife sitting in her chair in a very sexy nightie, holding a length of rope and some scarves.

"Tie me up," she purrs. "And you can do whatever you want."

So he tied her up and went golfing.
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PostBlade Posted: Sat Mar 07, 2009 5:53 pm   Post subject: Reply with quote

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Razz


I know alot of jokes, but I can't remember one single of them...

The only joke that comes to my mind is a quite bad one, pure black humor...
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chicken
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Postchicken Posted: Sat Mar 07, 2009 9:02 pm   Post subject: Reply with quote

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this one just came into my mind:

a doctor goes into a grocery and says "i want to bake a cake" and the shopkeeper says "i got some cream for that"

gosh that was so terrible XDD
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PostFreedan Posted: Sat Mar 07, 2009 10:22 pm   Post subject: Reply with quote

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A blonde joke I heard a while ago:

A blonde lady and her boyfriend were watching the news on TV. There was a story about two Brazilian skydivers who were killed after being caught in the engine of a passing plane.

After hearing the story, the blonde started to cry. "It's so terrible!", she screamed, crying louder. "All those people dying in such a horrible way!"

She turned to her boyfriend and asked "how many is a Bra-zillion, anyway?"
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Jason Tandro
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PostJason Tandro Posted: Sun Mar 08, 2009 12:25 am   Post subject: Reply with quote

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chicken wrote:
this one just came into my mind:

a doctor goes into a grocery and says "i want to bake a cake" and the shopkeeper says "i got some cream for that"

gosh that was so terrible XDD


you botched the joke! It's a proctologist, not just any old doctor!
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chicken
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Postchicken Posted: Sun Mar 08, 2009 7:49 am   Post subject: Reply with quote

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Jason Tandro wrote:
chicken wrote:
this one just came into my mind:

a doctor goes into a grocery and says "i want to bake a cake" and the shopkeeper says "i got some cream for that"

gosh that was so terrible XDD


you botched the joke! It's a proctologist, not just any old doctor!


that joke actually exists? Oo i thought i was just creating it lol Very Happy
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inferiare
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Postinferiare Posted: Sun Mar 08, 2009 8:36 am   Post subject: Reply with quote

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Ok ok I got one. Got this from my coworker in a text message of all things. Highlight to see the answer, since I made it a bit harder to see. Very Happy

What's the opposite of Christopher Reeves?


Christopher Walken.
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PostManibrandr System Posted: Sun Mar 08, 2009 10:33 am   Post subject: Reply with quote

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LOL Laughing

Chris Walken is the man!

Here is one :

Q : What do you get when you cross a black with a mexican?
A : Someone who is too lazy to steal.


Razz
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PostFreedan Posted: Sun Mar 08, 2009 9:20 pm   Post subject: Reply with quote

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Why are there no Mexicans on Star Trek?

- Because even in the future, they won't be working.
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chicken
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Postchicken Posted: Sun Mar 08, 2009 10:39 pm   Post subject: Reply with quote

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well now i got one as well:

Q: what do you get, when you cross an owl with a bungie cord?







A: my ass Very Happy

(got that one from kung pow ^^)
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PostEverPhoenix Posted: Tue Mar 10, 2009 11:59 am   Post subject: Reply with quote

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heres something i found somewhat amusing from a sitcom. horribly paraphrased, but the punchline remains the same



doctor: im gonna prescribe you some pills, and you should be fine

patient: but i cant swallow pills

doctor: thats ok, the pills are suppository

patient: oh... what do i do with those?

doctor: remember what i told you to do with that magazine subscription you tried to sell me?
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PostAzure Phoenix Posted: Tue Mar 10, 2009 9:34 pm   Post subject: Reply with quote

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chicken wrote:
(got that one from kung pow ^^)

Laughing Laughing Laughing

That movie owns Very Happy
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Jason Tandro
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PostJason Tandro Posted: Sat Mar 14, 2009 2:14 am   Post subject: Reply with quote

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Men are like toilets. They are either dirty, unavailable, out-of-order or full of shit.

Women are disoriented. They don't know their place.

Gotta love sexist jokes! Laughing
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