Truth

[SoulBlazerFan]

I'm going to delve a little into my personal life today. Maybe, if this experience helps one person, I'd be grateful.

So, the question I pose is, if you had the option to find out truths that have been out of your reach (And no, I'm not speaking about God/religion) but instead events that directly affected your own life, but you never knew about, would you want to know them?

My parents split up a few years ago. There was alot of pain, and anguish that went into it, and many unanswered questions. Before that, we had moved to this area from my birthtown. I never knew the reasons why, and it was more questions left unanswered.

I was... Jesus, 16 at the time. My dad had moved out, and my mother was in emotional shambles. She was so involved in her own problems she left her kids (For the most part) unattended. One day, I happen to be exploding in my parents bedroom. My father had been gone for a month by then, living at my aunt's house on their couch, and hadn't picked up any of his stuff.

In a drawer, I find an envelope. Inside the envelope, is eight pages of damning evidence. The front of the envelope reads "Bobby," in a handwriting I'd recognized from countless birthday cards; my grandfather.

Now mind you, my Grandfather wasn't a good man by any means. From the stories I've gathered, he was cruel to his children, a horrible husband, a greedy and corrupt man.

Money and food were his two vices, and all he desired. He was also a master of manipulation. It made him a good businessman, but it was his greed that would ruin all his ventures.

Setting up who he was leads to this letter. I remember the day today, just as I did the two years prior to my finding this letter. He drove up to the front of the house, and was going to place this note in our mailbox, so my father would get it later. Instead, my father saw alerted to his presense. They had a fight on our stoop. It was one of the last times I saw my grandfather before his death.

I had been interested in it's contents for a long time. What could he have written in here that I didn't know already? In reading this, what kind of Pandora's Box was I opening?

Well, safe to say, inside the letter were stories of abortion, lies, arrests. Money. Answers to questions I had. But, in the end of it all, these answers were meaningless and did little to cull my burgeoning need for information. In the end, my parents were still split up, my grandfather was still dead, and I was an emotional rollercoaster.

At the end of the day, the answers I found did nothing to help me then, and still don't today.

Have you ever been in this situation? Ever wanted information about your life that was out of reach to you? Have you ever had the choice to open your own "Pandora's Box," and, given the situation, what did you do?

[chicken]

yea, there are situations where i simply think "WHY?"... they happen all the time. but there's something i believe in: you'll know why eventually. a lot of stories (and i mean long stories with which i wont bore you) happened to me that way; especially in puberty. but there's something like a red thread through life and if you remember situations where you just didnt know WHY THIS HAD TO HAPPEN, and you think back a few years after, you'll probably understand. at least that's what works for me.

[Freedan]

I guess it depends on the situation.

When I was 12 or 13 and in school, a new guy came around. He was instantly despised by everyone, but I found I had a few things in common with the guy. We became friends, but everyone else still hated him (even my other friends). That put me in a pretty awkward position.

For the next two years, I was all the guy had. There was one guy in particular who set out to make the new guy's life miserable. But we weathered the storm, and eventually, people came to accept him after two years. Even the previously mentioned guy that hated him.

The three of us hung out together quite a bit. We get to high school, and a couple of months in, something happens. Both of them turn on me, no explanation given. After two years of being the only friend the guy ever had, he ditched me and sided with the guy who mercilessly bullied him.

I cut off contact with both. I've only ever spoken with the guy a handful of times since then (they both tried to make peace a few years later, and I 'accepted' for the sake of being civil, but we're no longer friends).

To this day, I don't know why they both came to hate me. I had literally done nothing to deserve it. Everything was fine one day, and the next, they turned away to avoid me.

Given the chance, I wouldn't care to know why. I'm friends with neither of them any more, and don't particularly care. The situation was what it was, and I was perfectly happy to move on. I've always chalked it up to 'kids being idiots', but knowing the truth wouldn't make me feel any different about it.


Now, in a situation where, say.... a loved one was killed. Like, murdered. I would want to know why. I couldn't accept someone close to me dying for no reason. If I knew why it happened, I could rationalize it (at least to myself), and give their death some kind of meaning. And it would give me someone to be angry at. It wouldn't change the facts in the end; they'd still be dead. But I would feel better if I had somewhere to direct my anger.

[psychokind]

SoulBlazerFan wrote:

Have you ever been in this situation? Ever wanted information about your life that was out of reach to you? Have you ever had the choice to open your own "Pandora's Box," and, given the situation, what did you do?

man, sounds like a story from a book or sth

so, to answer your questions:
1) not related to blood relatives. sometimes to other people (friends, gf, women...) about why they did this and that.
2) I want ALL the information that is out of my reach. I want to know EVERYTHING
3) not in a scale as big as yours, but you could say so. I always open it, no matter the consequences. information is only harmful if you don't know how to use it!

[Flamez]

Im a curious being by nature; given the oppertunity I would want to know, simple. Even if knowledge about an event would only make things harder for me I would want to know.

A good example would be a girl I went out with a year ago now. She had been coming into work a flirting with me for a few months, I eventually got the courage to ask her out and succeeded. We had a great first date, saw a shit movie, talked about nothing outside of small talk but didnt care because we were enjoying each others company; eventually the day came to an end, we kissed and went out separate ways.

That was our first, and only date. In my opinion it was the best first date I had ever had. Sadly from that point she just avoided me, and I never found out why. I would kill to know were I went wrong, or if I had nothing to do with this change in attitude.

[tay120n64]

It's simply amazing what an interesting assortment of individuals we have here at TE... For realz.

Anyway, there are some things I would like to know, but whenever I learn "hidden truths" I rarely do anything with the knowledge. For me, it's better NOT to know, because regardless of what I DO know, it's not going to change who I am and how I live. I'm still going to be the laid-back individual I am. It's rare that something actually bothers me so much that I HAVE to know. I am a curious individual, but often if finding the answer takes any sort of work, I usually just forget about it.

So in short, if raw information was handed to me (regardless of content), I'd read it, sigh, and move on.