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psychokind
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Postpsychokind Posted: Wed Mar 20, 2019 6:09 pm   Post subject: Reply with quote

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SoulBlazerFan wrote:
I've never understood the drive some people have, this innate need to have children. Like something is missing in life. I don't judge people that do, but it's not something I've ever seen as something that I want or even need.

Theres a lot of people I know who want kids and sadly it didn't help their situations. One relative had a kid and now they're struggling to just get by. It's crazy to me. I felt like if I ever did have kids I would want to be financially stable enough to provide for them. I lived through periods where there was no food in the house growing up and I don't want to have a child suffer that because I couldn't properly provide.


that's propably an extreme case, not having enough food. I can't speak for this being the reason to not have children, because in Germany welfare provides with everything. that being said, children do not need a lot except for love and care (given you have food and shelter).

since I have a child I find it hard to understand how one can actively decide to not have children despite being fertile. that's propably why it's a debate as old as modern western society (so about 50 years maybe? Very Happy ) - and an unsolvable one. often times you only hear the bad stories from parents who have real problems with their newborns / children, or horrifying birth stories which discourages many people even before they actually have their own.

what I found a real blessing is finding a woman who has an actual plan for life. that way I never had to question anything and just let myself get dragged along and enjoy the ride Laughing
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inferiare
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Postinferiare Posted: Mon Mar 25, 2019 8:16 am   Post subject: Reply with quote

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I can't afford it, mainly. I don't really want my life to revolve around a kid right now either.
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Valerie Valens
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PostValerie Valens Posted: Tue Apr 02, 2019 11:03 am   Post subject: Reply with quote

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Yeah, don't have a kid unless you can afford it. Those little shit-machines cost a fortune.
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inferiare
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Postinferiare Posted: Sun Apr 07, 2019 11:56 am   Post subject: Reply with quote

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Definitely can't right now lol. Maybe some day, or maybe some day I won't. Right now I'm content with seeing everyone else's kids and thinking they're cute, but I can give them back if they're in person when a dirty diaper comes into the equation Wink

I did have fun with 5 kids at Disneyland last year because hey, watching my nieces and nephew have a blast was fun, dangit. Even if the second youngest niece was too short to ride half the rides she wanted to go on pfff
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psychokind
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Postpsychokind Posted: Sun Apr 07, 2019 7:57 pm   Post subject: Reply with quote

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inferiare wrote:
Definitely can't right now lol. Maybe some day, or maybe some day I won't. Right now I'm content with seeing everyone else's kids and thinking they're cute, but I can give them back if they're in person when a dirty diaper comes into the equation Wink


that's propably why grandmas love having grandkids Very Happy
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inferiare
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Postinferiare Posted: Thu Apr 11, 2019 10:38 am   Post subject: Reply with quote

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Yeaaaaah. My mom in law has been pestering us, has 5, soon to be 6, grandkids already. Razz But they love their grandkids so it's not terrible but I'm not ready for kids since I can't just give a kid back lmao.
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PostValerie Valens Posted: Thu Apr 11, 2019 4:33 pm   Post subject: Reply with quote

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I am kinda glad I won't want to have kids. I mean, that would have made transitioning a lot more harder and awkward.
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PostMiss Prime Blue Posted: Wed Aug 28, 2019 5:09 pm   Post subject: Reply with quote

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Don't have any intentions of having kids. To me that's a good thing.
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PostSoulBlazerFan Posted: Mon Sep 02, 2019 6:46 am   Post subject: Reply with quote

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Miss Prime Blue wrote:
Don't have any intentions of having kids. To me that's a good thing.


My sister and brother both have kids now. My brother and his wife both work, own a home and are stable.

My sister is broke, pretends to be sick so she doesn't have to work, and her boyfriend/maybe baby daddy gives up on jobs the moment he doesn't get along with someone.

I have a cousin who now has two kids, wife won't work, and took to stealing food from his parents house because he couldn't afford for himself to eat.

Like I said months ago, I would never put a child or anyone else through that. I just find it wholly irresponsible.
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psychokind
fuck yeah!

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Postpsychokind Posted: Mon Sep 02, 2019 10:53 pm   Post subject: Reply with quote

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SoulBlazerFan wrote:
Miss Prime Blue wrote:
Don't have any intentions of having kids. To me that's a good thing.


My sister and brother both have kids now. My brother and his wife both work, own a home and are stable.

My sister is broke, pretends to be sick so she doesn't have to work, and her boyfriend/maybe baby daddy gives up on jobs the moment he doesn't get along with someone.

I have a cousin who now has two kids, wife won't work, and took to stealing food from his parents house because he couldn't afford for himself to eat.

Like I said months ago, I would never put a child or anyone else through that. I just find it wholly irresponsible.


I always wonder how people can behave like that when they have children. if I look at my daughter and think about putting my self interest before her so she has to suffer under it makes my stomach crawl. on the other hand, a baby just needs love, food & shelter. that's just so little to ask in western society...
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