Why Various Celebrities Don't Post on TE Forums

[Jason Tandro]

1. Hillary Clinton would post, but unfortunately she's too busy dodging sniper fire to type.

2. Bill Clinton would post, but there's no wifi in the toolshed.

3. President Obama will eventually post, but not until he makes sure that everybody has access to TerraEarth Forums regardless of their income.

4. Brock Lesnar is actually not allowed to post because of his disgraceful display on 4Chan. The administrators are afraid he'll tarnish the image of the forums.

5. Stephen Hawking tried to post, but since his computer is stuck in a blackhole his posts won't appear on the board for another 50 years.

Any other good jokes?

[Blade]

Chuck Norris would post, but he's waiting for TE:A to be finally released. Oh god, hell will break loose when he realizes he's not in the game

Adolf Hitler actually once posted here, but he was a faggy flamer & spammer, so we kicked him out.

[SoulBlazerFan]

Chuck Norris has in fact already played through TE: A, as everyone knows he's a time traveler. He hasn't visited yet because he's already posted his review in the future.

Jay-Z would post here, but one of his 99 problems is keeping him away.

Stephen King came to the site once, and we all scared him away.

[Freedan]

Paris Hilton would have posted here, but she couldn't spell TE.

[Jason Tandro]

Blade wrote:

Chuck Norris would post, but he's waiting for TE:A to be finally released. Oh god, hell will break loose when he realizes he's not in the game

What makes you think he isn't? Okay, he's not, but how cool would that be.


Stephanie Meyers would post here, but she hasn't had an inspirational wet dream yet.

[tay120n64]

Quentin Tarantino wanted to post on TE, but changed his mind when he saw there wasn't any cocaine.

[SoulBlazerFan]

Tim Burton would post here, but he's too busy making another shitty remake of a good film.

[inferiare]

Jack Thompson would post here, but he's too busy BAWWING over how terrible vidya gaems are, how he was ruined by teh vidya and got disbarred, and he'd be branded a hypocrite if he posted at a gaming forum. But you know he secretly loves it.

[Jason Tandro]

Aeris would post on the forums, but she has three distinct disqualifications:

1. She is inexperienced with computers.
2. She is dead.
3. She is fictional.

[Blade]

SoulBlazerFan wrote:

Tim Burton would post here, but he's too busy making another shitty remake of a good film.

Pardon me??


Johnny Depp would post here, but is too scared of me since he ripped off my overall look and behaviour.

[Freedan]

Rosie O'Donnell would post here, but she's currently eating a twinkie.

[SoulBlazerFan]

Blade wrote:

SoulBlazerFan wrote: Tim Burton would post here, but he's too busy making another shitty remake of a good film. Pardon me?? Johnny Depp would post here, but is too scared of me since he ripped off my overall look and behaviour.

Seen either Planet Of The Apes or Charlie and The Chocolate Factory? What aboot the forthcoming Alice In Wonderland?

OJ Simpson would post here, but he's too busy getting butt-raped in prison.

[Battle-Jesus]

Michael Bay would post here, but there aren't enough bouncing tits and explosions


Uwe Boll would post here, but luckily, the series isn't mainstream enough for him to make a movie out of

//FFFFFFFF. I AM GOING TO KILL BURTON FOR MAKING THE ALICE IN WONDERLAND MOVIE. I WILL SLAUGHTER HIS FAMILY AND HIS DICK.
ASJDHAKLSJHCASKDJCHSKDJHSAKDJHC

[chicken]

chevy chase wants to be on TE so badly but he is SO BROKE, he cant even pay his internet bill ^^

[SoulBlazerFan]

Al Gore would post on TE, but doesn't feel he needs to. Afterall, he did invent the internet.