I love spam emails

[Muerte]

Ah, thanks for clearing that up, I thought it meant people could say pretty much what they wanted without the fear of being punished for it.

[Freedan]

Nope. Just as long as everyone agrees with it.

And as long as it's pro-republican. You know, pro-war, anti-gay, anti-foreigner... that sort of thing.

[Axe Kazama]

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
I just realized that I didn't get that stupid letter with gay Jebus
how could you let your email address go up on this stupid list

[Freedan]

Arkisdabomb sent it, it's not like I gave out my address or anythin'. He looked it up and added me to his contacts.

[Muerte]

What ^he said.

[eFlare]

From: musab [mailto:mus99@icn.od.ua]
To: terraearth@justlikeed.net
Subject: New message


Invitation to study in Ukraine

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


We look forward to the New Year filled with hope and confidence just as we started

We are still committed to serving Sudanese and Arab Students, through dedicating all available resource to help them in the pursuit of bright future by making easy their enrollment to the Ukrainian Universities.

We welcome you to our offices spread in Jordan where you would find our qualified team ready to help you.

For the foreign students, willing to get education in Russian or Ukrainian, the first year of study in our University is training at the preparatory faculty, which is the first stage to obtain the Master's certificate.

The preparatory faculty of our University is one of the largest in Ukraine. The highest training level, the modern teaching technologies (including computer) of Russian and Ukrainian, the fully providing with text-books, methodical aids and highly qualified lecturers guarantees the qualitative study in any higher educational establishment of any region of Ukraine and Russian Federation.

Besides the language of specialty, the students of the preparatory faculty study chemistry, physics, biology, mathematics and other subjects necessary for the further study.

The training at the preparatory faculty starts from September, 1 to November, 15 (depending on the groups completing). Duration of study is 9-10 months.

To enter the preparatory faculty of the National University of Pharmacy the foreign citizen should present the following documents:
Secondary education certificate (original or copy certified by a notary);
Copy of birth certificate;
Medical certificate of health condition given at least for 2 months before entering Ukraine;
AIDS test results;
National passport;
Urgent medical aid insurance (after arrival to study in Ukraine one can get it at the admission committee);
8 photos 3X4;

After finishing of the preparatory faculty the standard certificate is given, that gives the right to enter any higher educational establishments of Ukraine by any specialty.

Even the higher educational establishments of Kharkov and Odessa allow you to get education in more than 400 specialties!


The cost of study in Ukraine between 1500$ to 2500$


For more information please contact us

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Email
www.mus99@icn.od.ua
telephone
Odessa Ukraine
380487355049 Dr. Musab

Abu Dhabi U. A. E.
+971505724503 Yousif

Khartoum Sudan
+249912516183 Hafiz
--- Sent by UNREGISTERED VERSION of Atomic Mail Sender.
Please register to remove this message.


Riight...

[Freedan]

What they really need to teach is English. The grammar is something out of the 4th grade remedial class.

[inferiare]

I love it when I get spam e-mails in a language I can't understand.

From : Martin Jimenez <martinjimenez@totalemail.net>
Reply-To : "Martin Jimenez" <martinjimenez@totalemail.net>
Sent : Tuesday, July 19, 2005 4:03 PM
To : <kaze_no_toorimichi@hotmail.com>
Subject : Te vienes de vacaciones?


¿TE QUIERES VENIR AL CARIBE SIN GASTAR UN €?

La semana que viene salimos un grupito de colegas para el caribe con todo pagado por nuestros TRUCOS de casinos.

En solo 10 dias hemos sacado para paar los 7 viajes de los que vamos, el viaje es a Punta cana a la Republica Dominicana y esta es la ficha del viaje PINCHA AQUI PARA VER FOTOS si no conoceis el sistema os lo cuento.

Bajais y ejecutais este fichero, que es el casino, que se instala en vuestro ordenador, verificado sin virus, PINCHA AQUI PARA BAJAR

Y leeis una de estas paginas que es donde se explica el truco, la que quieras son todas iguales, TRUCO 1 , TRUCO 2 , TRUCO 3, lo de poner 3 urls iguales es porque nos las borran de los servidores, para que la gente no lo sepa, en caso de que no te funcionen dinoslo y te pasaremos otra url.

Saludo y nos vemos en punta cana

Martin Jimenez




Recibes este email como usuario registrado en TOTALEMAIL.NET, si acaso deseas darte de baja del servicio manda un email a bajas@totalemail.net . El fichero de usuarios de totalemail.net está inscrito en la Agencia de Protección de Datos Española


Translated on Babelfish (which won't make much sense, but it'll still be funny to read):

YOU ARE WANTED TO COME TO THE CARIBBEAN WITHOUT SPENDING?

The week that comes we left a small group colleagues for the Caribbean paid yet by our TRICKS of casinos.

In single 10 days we have removed to paar the 7 trips of which we go, the trip is to white End to the Dominican Republica and this is the card of the trip KITCHEN MAID AQUI TO SEE PHOTOS if not conoceis the system you the story.

Bajais and ejecutais this file, that is the casino, that settles in your computer, verified without virus, KITCHEN MAID AQUI TO LOWER

And leeis one of these paginas that is where the trick is explained, the one that you want are all equal, TRICK 1, TRICK 2, TRICK 3, the one to put 3 urls equal is because us they erase them of the servants, so that people do not know it, in case that they do not work dinoslo to you and we will pass another URL to you.

Greeting and we see ourselves in white end
Martin Jimenez

You receive east email like user registered in TOTALEMAIL.NET, in case you wish darte of loss of the service sends an email bajas@totalemail.net. The file of users of totalemail.net is enrolled in the Agency of Spanish Protection of Data

Well dayum, I can go to the Carribean. But I don't WANT to.

[Freedan]

From : Ice Cream Survey <survey@famousdiner.net>
Reply-To : "Ice Cream Survey" <survey@famousdiner.net>
Sent : July 20, 2005 5:54:18 AM
To : <js_7_7_7@hotmail.com>
Subject : Ben & Jerry's Or Haagen-Dazs?









Wow.

This is like some beautiful dream. Lots and lots of ice cream. Or rather, $100 worth of ice cream. Of course, since we're talking about the biggest brands of the stuff, that's about 2 of those shitty little boxes of it. The only thing standing in my way of free ice cream is these eligibility requirements. All I have to do is pack up my life and move down south, and I'll get my ice cream.

What caught my eye was the last image, which says they're "CAN-SPAM" compliant. Do I even need to make some smart-ass remark about the irony of the words "can spam"? These people satirize themselves.

At face value, you'd think this was just some ordinary spam. But no, this one is quite special. Below, I've copied and pasted the text that followed the advertisement. The super-wonderful thing was this text was all in white in the email body, which hid it against the white background. If these people insist on spamming me, they could at least get rid of all this extra text and try to make it LOOK authentic.

I've put the last part of this hidden mystery text in bold, so you can see how much it has to do with free ice cream.




# Re: Passenger Lists for Ships LEAVING NYC for Italy - Robert Jerin 8/19/04 * LPC SEC 11 & Under 16-Special Inquiry and.. - Thomas 8/15/04 o Re: LPC SEC 11 & Under 16, Partial Answer - Sue 8/15/04 + Re: LPC SEC 11 & Under 16, Partial Answer - Thomas 8/15/04 * IRISH EMIGRATION - NICHOLAS DIDOMENICO 8/11/04 o Re: IRISH EMIGRATION - rebecca redden 9/14/04 o Re: IRISH EMIGRATION - K H 8/23/04 + Re: IRISH EMIGRATION - NICHOLAS DIDOMENICO 8/24/04 * Guggenheim/Pletsch US arrival dates? - Antoinnette Maize 8/11/04 * surnames---sarchuk----mochoruk - Sandy Scott 8/10/04 * NY Passenger lists - Deborah Fordham 8/08/04 o Re: NY Passenger lists - Jenna Tong 8/09/04 + Re: NY Passenger lists - Deborah Fordham 8/09/04 * Ship arrivals in PA - Myra O'Dowd 8/04/04 * passenger lists - Sandy Scott 8/03/04 o Re: passenger lists - Renee Neumann 10/24/04 + Re: passenger lists - Evelyn Christian 5/06/05 o Re: passenger lists - Jenna Tong 8/08/04 + Re: passenger lists - Sandy Scott 8/10/04 o Re: passenger lists - kh 8/04/04 * Jean Baptiste Baratcart -- France - Nancy Leavitt 8/03/04 Does anyone know how you can remove the X close box in the upper right hand corner of a user form? Thanks, Mike Mike, I copied the following section from Module 4 of Project 98 Visual Basic Environment Training. You can download the whole training file by going to the MVP website at: http://www.mvps.org/project/links.htm The link to the VBA training file is at the bottom of the page. New England 1634 - Leilani 8/27/98 * kaiser wilhelm II and lusitania - terrie 8/26/98 o Re: Online Ship Arrivals and Lists - Edmond Spaeth 11/15/98 o Re: kaiser wilhelm II and lusitania - Nancy Lutz 10/02/98 o Re: kaiser wilhelm II and lusitania - Soraya Bambha 8/31/98 o Re: kaiser wilhelm II and lusitania - Wanda Nelson 8/27/98 * VENCE EMIGRATION FROM WHERE? - VENCE Pacheco 8/22/98 o Re: VENCE EMIGRATION FROM WHERE? - sarah young 2/09/04 * PASSENGERSHIPS ONLINE!! just found this - Robin Sloan 8/21/98 o Re: PASSENGERSHIPS ONLINE!! just found this - don hillier 9/22/98 + Re: PASSENGERSHIPS ONLINE!! just found this - Sharon L. Hogan 2/26/99 07/98 + Re: Johannes Greber or Craver from Germany - grace clement 8/08/98 * England to Maryland - 1684-86 - Fran 8/05/98 * Passenger ship carrying convicts1775 - Jaime LaPlante 8/05/98 o Re: Passenger ship carrying convicts1775 - diane turner 5/03/01 + Re: Passenger ship carrying convicts1775 - Charles Keith 11/16/02 * Conte or Conta Biano Mano (NY? to Italy) - Carolyn Cristiano Distin 8/03/98 o Re: Conte or Conta Biano Mano (Genoa ) - Jerry Adamik 10/30/98 + Re: Conte or Conta Biano Mano (Genoa ) - Paul Liut 11/06/98 o Re: Conte or Conta Biano Mano (NY? to Italy) - Carolyn Cristiano Distin 8/03/98 * Lookup wanted: June 24,1907 SS Livonia - Dennis Baer 8/01/98 * William Prosser and Ann Jones - 1819 - Carol Myers 8/01/98 o Re: William Prosser and Margaret Teasdale m 1780 - Patti Graman 1/10/02 + Re: William Prosser and Margaret Teasdale m 1780 - Carol Myers 1/10/02 o Re: William Prosser and Ann Jones - 1819 - Carol Myers 8/04/98 * Irish arriving in Boston 1890's 1900's - Claire Pinard 8/01/98 * Westfalen, Germany to OHIO in 1880 - Kelly Rodgers 8/01/98 o Re: Westfalen, Germany to OHIO in 1880 - Martin Verhaegh 10/09/98 * PATRIOTE-ship from Germany to USA 1853 - Glenn Vogedes 7/31/98 * ESSNER-Baltimore-1833 - patty cope 7/29/98 o Re: ESSNER-Baltimore-1833 - Carolyn Kemp 2/15/99 o Re: ESSNER-Baltimore-1833 - Carolyn Kemp 2/15/99 o Re: Emigation 1882 from NORWAY - Soraya Bambha 7/26/97 + Re: Emigation 1882 from NORWAY - Johnson 2/27/98 # Re: Emigation 1882 from NORWAY - Mary Lou Amdahl Tyson 5/19/00 * Re: Emigation 1882 from NORWAY - V.Lund 9/19/00 o Re: Emigation 1882 from NORWAY - Mary Lou Amdahl Tyson 9/19/00 + Re: Emigation 1882 from NORWAY - G.Åhling 9/24/00 # Re: Emigation 1882 from NORWAY - A. Klee 1/14/99 + Re: Emigation 1882 from NORWAY - Julie McCullough 11/16/97 * Heitkamp - David Hartley 7/21/97 o Re: Heitkamp - Elizabeth Louise Browning 12/11/98 o Re: Heitkamp - Soraya Bambha 7/26/97 # AW: AW: AW: iSaSiLk w/o RSA talking to SSL web server, Peter Lipp # Re: AW: AW: iSaSiLk w/o RSA talking to SSL web server, Polar Humenn # Re: AW: AW: iSaSiLk w/o RSA talking to SSL web server, Ralph Roland + Re: AW: AW: iSaSiLk w/o RSA talking to SSL web server, Thomas Dorris # AW: AW: AW: iSaSiLk w/o RSA talking to SSL web server, Peter Lipp # Re: AW: AW: AW: iSaSiLk w/o RSA talking to SSL web server, Thomas Dorris :: Sat Jul 28 15:11:31 2007 + Re: AW: AW: iSaSiLk w/o RSA talking to SSL web server, Polar Humenn # AW: AW: AW: iSaSiLk w/o RSA talking to SSL web server, Peter Lipp o AW: AW: AW: iSaSiLk w/o RSA talking to SSL web server, Peter Lipp * iSaSiLk w/o RSA talking to SSL web server, Thomas Dorris o AW: iSaSiLk w/o RSA talking to SSL web server, Peter Lipp o Re: iSaSiLk w/o RSA talking to SSL web server, Ralph Roland + Re: iSaSiLk w/o RSA talking to SSL web server, Thomas Dorris + AW: iSaSiLk w/o RSA talking to SSL web server, Peter Lipp # Re: AW: iSaSiLk w/o RSA talking to SSL web server, Polar Humenn + Re: iSaSiLk w/o RSA talking to SSL web server, Andreas Sterbenz Comments: In Memory The query that was sent to CAC was as follows: AUSTRALIA could be asked to take over Britain's military command in southern Iraq, which would require up to 300 more defence personnel to be sent to the war-torn country. The newspaper said an option under consideration was to have Australia take over Britain's divisional headquarters in the southern Iraq city of Basra, according to an article which appeared in the London Sunday Times. Washington was keen for Canberra to take over the command role should Britain pull back its troops, the article said.


You know, sometimes I wish that instead of a "trash" can, my email account had a "fuck you" can that sent a fatal virus to the spammer's email account whenever it was used. I'd get a lot of mileage out of it, guaranteed.

[inferiare]

So they want you to move to the US and become a citizen by eating ice cream so you can go fight the war in Iraq for Bush?

[eFlare]

I feel kinda sad for him though

[Freedan]

Over 0? That's a pretty major accomplishment.

I've gotten about a dozen advertisements for that too, just with no pictures.

[inferiare]

I usually don't get a lot of spam. It all goes to my spam box anyways if it's not from someone I allow.

[Freedan]

That's too bad. You're missing out on $100 worth of ice cream.

[inferiare]

Yeah, but I'm already fat, I don't need ice cream to make me even fatter.