PM I got regarding "cyber bullying" on youtube

[Manibrandr System]

Now here is how the story goes. One day a wave of mass hysteria swept YouTube, and it regards "cyber bullying" or in net terms, "trolling". It showed and featured numerous kids whose lives got destroyed by trolling, and some who took their lives over it. What all those videos fail to show is that all those kids are dumb/naïve enough to have their personal information plastered all over places like Myspace, Xanga etc where people who know her IRL could access.

I remarked on that, how those kids are themselves at fault for their carelessness and that they had set themselves up for that. I also remarked about how they are allowing themselves to be so affected by words on the internet, and that they deserve scorn for wasting everyone's time on this trivial bullshit that shouldn't matter.

That was months ago, and I have long since forgotten the link to that specific video. Hell, I had forgotten about the issue altogether. Then, this popped up on my PMs in YouTube.



What a nice way to get your point of view across, right?

Here is my reply :

Allow me to clear up a few misconceptions here :

- Everyone has their own fair share of put downs in life. In the context of what you are speaking about, the depressed are far more well off than people in third or second world countries. Why? They do not count their blessings, they do not see what they do have because they take them for granted. That is what you would call spoiled.

- I do try to help people through rough times, friend or foe. However, those who are obnoxiously loud about their problems and overblow them have proven themselves to be indifferent to the mood of those around them and the mood of the discussion at hand. Funnily though, it seems that how grateful they are when I do extend a hand to help is always inversely proportional to how loud and obnoxious they are about their problems. You want to talk about inconsideration? There you have it.

While we're at it, since the video in question also spoke of kids who killed themselves over some harmless internet hijinx, I am going to comment on how the suicidal folk are amongst the most hateful, disgusting, inconsiderate and malicious people ever known to mankind.

Okay so imagine what happens when a person takes their lives, first their friends and relatives will feel almost unbearable emotional pain for the next few months, there will be a huge ass funeral bill that they have to foot to give you a proper burial and eulogy, and moreover the pain of bereavement and self-loathing they will feel thinking that they could have prevented it will remain on their minds for the rest of their lives. Note that all this is intentional, the people who took their own lives or those who desire to actually want to inflict this onto their loved ones. They do not care for those who want them around, they do not care for the mess they will leave for their loved ones, they only see problems that are overinflated in magnitude because it pertained to them. I wouldn't even think of inflicting this kind of shit on my worst enemy, how the fuck can you even begin to justify this kind of hateful, wasteful and vindictive act?

...and you are calling me inconsiderate?

Now there is nothing wrong with being sad and expressing it, I do realise that people need a helping hand from time to time from others to get through and I usually am the first one to lend that helping hand. However, if they decide to be horribly inconsiderate about it, they can keep crying in the dark, it builds the much needed character that they lack.

Now, if you want to discuss this further with me in a rational fashion, then go ahead. What you saw from my comment on the video is nothing more than honesty, nothing more, nothing less. You will find that, should you decide to talk to me further in an amiable manner, this is a virtue that I value a lot more highly than any small-minded task of overinflating the egos of those who did not earn it.

Otherwise, you are a close-minded hypocrite for accusing me of close-mindedness and you can fuck right off.

Good day.

Discuss.

[chicken]

lol always had my fun with people like this guy but i actually dont waste time responding to them, cause they will NEVER EVER say something like "you are right" so i cannot see any sense in answering their stupid ass comments

anyway, you gave a good response i do like it

[Blade]

Quote:

all those kids are dumb/naïve enough to have their personal information plastered all over places like Myspace, Xanga etc

e-x-a-c-t-l-y

I'm not that deep in this net-life, I honestly must say that I haven't met any of those internet-kids who rant around all day (maybe 1 or 2 on another forum).

A few years ago, I would've considered the internet as a "place" where I can go to relax and step back from rl issues.
Nowadays, it seems like some people need to do some rl stuff to get away from their internet-life problems.
I mean honestly, beside drawing, reading, making music and listening to music, is there anything in their life that they do with people they actually meet?
(no offense to those who draw, read and make music )

[Manibrandr System]

Gaming, sex, eating out, arcade-hopping, shopping etc

[Blade]

...going on quests, meeting friends, getting drunk...

etc.

[Freedan]

You're right. I find it very hard to have sympathy for people that take their own life, especially because people on the internet were being mean to them.

Not only do they put their loved ones through all of the pain you mentioned, but it's the coward's way out. One bullet to the head, and all your troubles are over. God forbid they take action to change their lot in life if they aren't happy.

It doesn't matter how bad things may seem to get; even if you hit rock bottom, it's all uphill from there. But not if you're dead.

[Manibrandr System]

Freedan, the Dark Knight wrote:

It doesn't matter how bad things may seem to get; even if you hit rock bottom, it's all uphill from there. But not if you're dead.

Yes, thank you. After all, life is what you make of it. There is always a silver lining to every storm cloud.

[tay120n64]

I don't think there is anything I can add to this that hasn't already been said, but I would like you to know that your reply was very well put together, and I absolutely agree that people let themselves blow their depression out of proportion. Granted, people do need to be more understanding when a person isn't feeling well, but if a person doesn't want to accept help, then it's obvious they just want attention. At any rate, Kudos on the reply. I think I may show it to people.

[inferiare]

Anytime I think of people being bullied on the internet, I picture stock footage of a yellow van blowing up on Fox News.

However, I find it hilarious that the person that PMed you about that went on and on about how inconsiderate you are that you were honest that they were idiots about putting up their home phone/address whatever on the internet. I give out my cell number, sure, but not on a huge forum like 4chan or something. I give it out on a small basis (like my friends only LJ, or through IM) to close friends. If I put it out on my MySpace, or on 4chan, the phonecalls would never stop.

It's pretty easy to stop the cyber bullying, and really, if someone were to call me fat and ugly over the internet, I don't think I would really give a shit. They're faceless assholes who have to get themselves off by insulting people over the internet, and they're easy to ignore. All it takes is the ignore button, or setting your AIM friends list to 'People on my buddy list only'.

But to kill yourself because someone called you an idiot or something like that over the internet? Lame. :/

[Muerte]

rainichan wrote:

Anytime I think of people being bullied on the internet, I picture stock footage of a yellow van blowing up on Fox News.

Ahahahaha, I lol'd.

(I'll edit this with something that has more substance when I'm not so tired.

[Manibrandr System]

rainichan wrote:

Anytime I think of people being bullied on the internet, I picture stock footage of a yellow van blowing up on Fox News. However, I find it hilarious that the person that PMed you about that went on and on about how inconsiderate you are that you were honest that they were idiots about putting up their home phone/address whatever on the internet. I give out my cell number, sure, but not on a huge forum like 4chan or something. I give it out on a small basis (like my friends only LJ, or through IM) to close friends. If I put it out on my MySpace, or on 4chan, the phonecalls would never stop. It's pretty easy to stop the cyber bullying, and really, if someone were to call me fat and ugly over the internet, I don't think I would really give a shit. They're faceless assholes who have to get themselves off by insulting people over the internet, and they're easy to ignore. All it takes is the ignore button, or setting your AIM friends list to 'People on my buddy list only'. But to kill yourself because someone called you an idiot or something like that over the internet? Lame. :/

They prolly internalize insults because they really are idiots. I mean, it's common sense not to give out your personal information online unless you can really trust them.

[SoulBlazerFan]

I think the real problem here is people are misdiagnosing the true illness here. People who are suicidal and depressed came to these other places- whether it be Myspace, or Xanga, youtube, or whatever- and let it fill their lives, because they were trying to escape their real lives, for whatever reason. Only now, they find similiar or the exact same shit there, bullying and everything along those lines.

While I do find it silly to kill yourself over the "net life," if a person has come to the decision to end their lives, it's not for their pleasure or enjoyment of making the others around them suffer. It's their internal and external struggles coming to ahead, and death becoming the single choice in their minds to escape the torment of their existence.

I've known a few people who've been there, and this is the only part I disagree with Valerie on; if you care about a person and feel that they are slipping into depression or suicide, you don't just give up on them. I feel that's wrong... you just do what you can. If I call someone a friend, I never give up on them, and I do my best to help them any way I can, whether they want me to or not.

I do wholeheartily agree with your post, but giving up on people because their turning their anger onto you is never the right thing. You have to find a way to change things- or find someone who can, like a teacher, family, or another friend. Giving up is easier than sticking through, and I feel anyway, the real, true friends are those that stay through the good times and the bad.

[Manibrandr System]

SoulBlazerFan wrote:

I think the real problem here is people are misdiagnosing the true illness here. People who are suicidal and depressed came to these other places- whether it be Myspace, or Xanga, youtube, or whatever- and let it fill their lives, because they were trying to escape their real lives, for whatever reason. Only now, they find similiar or the exact same shit there, bullying and everything along those lines. While I do find it silly to kill yourself over the "net life," if a person has come to the decision to end their lives, it's not for their pleasure or enjoyment of making the others around them suffer. It's their internal and external struggles coming to ahead, and death becoming the single choice in their minds to escape the torment of their existence.

Unfortunately I really cannot agree with this. The fact remains that their loved ones will carry emotional scars from that suicide for the rest of their lives. It says something about them if that is not enough to convince them to be around for those who they supposedly care for. Since when does being alive become such a chore anyways? Do you see people in 3rd world countries who are suffering begging each other to end their suffering? No, they fight tooth-and-nail to stay alive, and here we have people throwing the luxury of not having to worry about staying alive away because of problems that crop up in their lives that may seem painful, but not nearly as permanent as the solution in their minds.

Quote:

I've known a few people who've been there, and this is the only part I disagree with Valerie on; if you care about a person and feel that they are slipping into depression or suicide, you don't just give up on them. I feel that's wrong... you just do what you can. If I call someone a friend, I never give up on them, and I do my best to help them any way I can, whether they want me to or not.

Would it help to say that I have been on that road before? That's where you misunderstand my point ; It is thanks to that experience of mine in the dark that allows me to tell the difference between genuine sadness and a small-minded cry for attention using the most minor problems as an excuse. I do try to help the former group as much as I can, but the latter group, like I said, can keep crying in the dark.

Quote:

I do wholeheartily agree with your post, but giving up on people because their turning their anger onto you is never the right thing. You have to find a way to change things- or find someone who can, like a teacher, family, or another friend. Giving up is easier than sticking through, and I feel anyway, the real, true friends are those that stay through the good times and the bad.

The previous paragraph covers this. Moreover, the people who I've turned my back on, I never knew them enough to consider them my friends. They cry about their problems in the middle of a conversation, I give them the solution, they yell at me because they do not want solutions, only sympathy. This happened to me so many times that I rather just dispense my advice to those who would actually listen. In other words, I feel that pissing in the wind is worse than not doing anything at all. If I do something, I want it to be as effective as possible.

[Axe Kazama]

I'm really sitting on the fence on the issue, SBF raises the good point that there are people who are reclusive or have trouble handling the real world. Bullying is bullying whether it'd be through some big stupid kid or through email, nobody wants to get an insulting email. So when these people who live their lives on the net and suddenly get shunned away, what's left?

Then again, suicide over some words on the net is pretty dumb.

I think people should be warned about the dangers of the internet
...like referring them onto 4chan

man...never EVER putting up my details on the net anymore

[Manibrandr System]

Or should be directed to the Practice Internet