You Know What Burns My Ass? Fast Food Workers

[SoulBlazerFan]

Disclaimer: I don't actually know what "burning my ass" means, so please don't ask. Someone once said it, and I thought it was hilarious.

As the title description reads, there are days where I absolutely hate people that work in the fast food industry. Particularly tonight, because of they did three things on my top five worst fast food mistakes, all on the same order.

You see, I understand being forgetful about certain stuff. You know, if you're an atomic energy specialist and you forget some safeguards and end up destroying a place like Cherylnobyl, that I get. It's a complicated job, you know?

But these people? How hard is it to microwave a burger? I mean, seriously? It's all you do. Microwave,bottom bun, lettuce, pickle, special sauce where applicable, cheese, and bottom bun. However, these guys act like it's some sort of science, like a perfect ratio of two pickles to 57 shreds of lettuce. I don't know know about you, all I want is something quick and delicious, and I couldn't give to shits about ratios or anything like that. The job isn't hard. If it was, they wouldn't pay you minimum wage for it, would they? I mean, hell, I work overnight stock at Target and I make more than some management at Burger King. My friend worked for BK for four years, then was promoted to manager. He made 9 dollars an hour as management. I started Target overnight at 8.50, quarter raise at three months, quarter raise at a year. I was already making THE SAME as he was! I mean, come on.

Anyway, tonight I went with this same friend to get some McD's. I don't eat cheese, so obviously, anything I order I get it without any cheese. Like I said, they did three of the top five things I hate most in one order, so let me start with that.

1. FUCKING UP THE ORDER

Obviously, that burns my ass. If I order something without cheese, I expect it to not have cheese. Most of the time, I look in the bag at one or two items to see if they messed up, most of them have special tickets saying they were special ordered. So not a problem. I get home, only to realize they screwed up the most expensive item I ordered.

My average McD's order is usually a meal with an extra McDouble since I rarely eat more than once a day anymore. So, my order is something like this: Let me get a number 1 (Big Mac), no cheese, medium with a sweet tea, no ice. Let me also get a McDouble, no cheese.

I look at the McDouble before I go, no cheese. I don't want to be a dick, so I don't hold up the line, and drive home. I get home, start in on my meal, eat the McDouble, then the fries, and leave the Big Mac as the grand finale. I lift up the box top- to see that horrible, yellow squared-off gooey corner of gross.

Nevermind that they filled the cup up with ice despite the fact that that I said no ice, I specifically asked for NO CHEESE, and yet, I get cheese anyway. When this happens, I have four choices: Toss that shit out, go back and complain (if I'm still there I will do this, but not often), give it to a friend (Here, take my four dollar sandwich, I'll eat this shitty dollar one instead) or, take off the top half, which has no cheese, and get rid of the bottom. Tonight, I decided to do the last one... at least I got to eat two dollars our of that four.

If I'm ordering a sandwich without cheese, I expect a sandwich without cheese. No offense to anyone who does, or has, worked in the fast food "industry," if you can even call it that, how hard is it to fuck that up? It's a piece of cheese. I said, "No cheese," on two seperate sandwiches. What, you can get it right on the first, but you can't get it right on the second? Jesus H Christonabun. Go back to school and get a real job.

2. COLD FRIES

Anyone whose eaten at a McDonalds will know this all too well. You get a value meal, only for them to give you a lukewarm burger, a warm drink, and the holy grail of go screw yourself, cold fries. I mean, I've all but given up on eating fries, because even the simpliest of Fast food preperation seems beyond these counter jockeys. They can't even deep fry a froezen plastic bag full of pre-cooked french fries (This is exactly how they do it- same with mcnuggets) how can I expect any less from them?

This, along with the screwed up order I go tonight, reminds me why I only get it every so often. Nevermind it's completely unhealthy. Nevermind the teenagers working behind the counter likely spit in my food. Nevermind some of the places are so disgusting that you could get a disease and die. They can't even cook a burger, or, if you want to get technical, a burger-type patty, because who even knows what comprises a McDonalds burger these days anyway?

When I found out Taco Bell was using mostly an oat/meat byproduct, not only did I not care, but they're food is actually good half the time, and they don't screw up nearly as often as McDonalds does.

3. NO STRAW

The cups McDonalds gives you are cheap and made of cardboard about as thin as paper. The only one that doesn't is the large- made of plastic- and the value Sweet Tea, which is a styrofoam cup. With a wide brim top, and a cup filled mostly with a mixture of, something like, 90 percent ice versus 10 percent beverage, you're begging for a straw. Well, screw up number three. They didn't even include any straws with our order. I mean, you give me cold fries, a burger I can't eat, and now I have to drink the beverage without a straw?

Don't get me wrong, it is a minor gripe. But when I specifically asked for no ice, you give me a beverage loaded with ice, now I got to drink it without a straw, and those ice cubes touch your teeth even for a second- a feeling so uncomfortable I can't even really describe it, but if it's happened to you, you'll know what I mean.

There are things I do so often in life I don't realize I do them- from starting my car, to putting on my headlights, my seatbelt. At work, I'm just so attunted to the usually drag of things I don't even realize I have my boxcutter in one hand half the time, ready to open up a box. Hell, I even close it after every box and forget I do.

You have a routine, in life, you do these things without thinking. Especially if you've worked in fast food for a long time, how hard is it to throw two straws into a bag? I just expect them to be in there, everyone else does it. And this happens so infrequently I don't even bother to check for them, I just expect them to be there.

Anyway, that's about the length of my annoyence tonight for this specific McDonalds. So, I'll give you my last two gripes, and that'll be it:

4. FAST FOOD WORKERS WHO COMPLAIN ABOUT THEIR JOBS

My friend did this for seven years. He complained about how much the people sucked, how much the workers sucked, how much the customers sucked, management, and on and on and on.

Alot of them act like Fast Food is the end all, be all of existence. It reminds me of the last scene of the movie Clerks. Randal sums it up best:

Quote:

"...Jesus, nobody twisted your arm to be here. You're here of your own volition. You like to think the weight of the world rests on your shoulder... you over-compensate for having what is basically a monkey's job. You push buttons. Anybody can waltz in here and do our jobs. You're so obsessed with making things seem so much more epic, so much more important than it really is... We look down at them as if we're so advanced. Well, if we're so fucking advanced, what are we doing working here?"

Paraphrased, sure, but it sums up my feeling about this to a T. I'm not going to say I don't complain about my job- I'd be a hypocrit, I've done it here even. Its just when you complain about every facet of a job- maybe it's time to move on.

And finally...

5. RONALD MCDONALD... and Friends

Alot of people I knew growing up hated clowns. Yet, they loved McDonalds. It's like hey, I hate my dentist, but I love that numb feeling I get from taking novacaine, so I guess it's okay.

Well, this guy is a creep. He's ripped kids off for years. You think you're getting some sort of cool toy in your happy meal, but when you get it, you realize it's a cheap piece of plastic that breaks in a day or so. The coolest toy I remember getting was the DeLorean from Back to the Future- the back end sparked I think, and if was a wind-up toy car. I loved that thing, but too bad every time I tried to get the other three in the set (One was a train, one was Marty on a skateboard, and the last the time train for BTTF 3), all I ever got was the stupid train and about three more DeLoreans.

I mean, I feel for those jerks (I actually wrote "jokes" by accident, because subconsiously that's what they are) that tried to collect all 101 Dalmatian toys for like, 1999 or something.

I mean, this guy has been around since the fifties, and being a spokesperson for a burger company offering poor food choices and cheaply made mass produced toys. He even had a NES game - McKids- which AVGN did a video for.

I think he even had his own series at some point, but that may be my imagination running wild, and just the increasingly more elaborate commericials during the late 80's/early 90's. He did have his assorted "friends," like Mayor McCheese and Grimace.
That purple fuck is the bane of my existence. What is he, anyway? The other characters are kind of defined, at least. The Hamburglar is a moronic creep who loves burgers more than Michael Jackson loved kids (Too soon? I don't care, we all know he was as guilty as OJ), Ronald is a pedophile clown, there was a girl who was a bird with aviator gear, I guess she was supposed to be Amelia Earhart... she certainly disappeared off the face of the Earth just like her.

Even Mayor McCheese was a guy with a burger head. What the fuck was the Grimace? A purple Christmas tree? A walking mountain? If someone could tell me, I'd appreciate it.

http://memegenerator.net/instance/10081768

But Ronald has always stood out as the mascot of the Golden Arch, and will forever be synonmous with McDonalds, and he will forever by synomous with my undying hatred of Fast food workers, and their constant, rampant stupidity. Thank you for taking the time to read, and good night.

[inferiare]

Grimace is the nommer of babies.

Ok, actually I have no idea. But all of those things you outlined? I hate that too.

[Fazermint]

I always have to pay extra on Burger King because the workers add every item separately to the price, and have obviously never heard of menus.

I sometimes go to the burger king on Schiphol Airport in Holland (There's a train station under the airport that I use every school day). All the workers are foreign. They speak horrible dutch and horrible english. This way I always get the wrong order.

[EverPhoenix]

my friend has similar complaints about fast food. whenever i go with him to hungry jack's (burger king almost everywhere else), he orders an angus burger without a few of the things on it. to date i think there have been 3 times when he's gotten that. every other time, he's gotten the normal burger, with all the crap he doesnt like on there.

i honestly dont know how stupid some people can get. its either that or they just dont care.

[tay120n64]

Taco Bell gets my order wrong EVERY OTHER TIME.

Most commonly, they add lettuce, despite me saying no lettuce. I can sort of understand this. When you're used to doing something systematically, you add it without thinking. But this place is rarely busy, so why not take your time? What's the rush? You're just gonna have to make it again when I bring it back.

I don't really eat at McD anymore. Actually, on topic, there was this time I went there when I was, like... ten or something. I was with my mom and we went through the drive through. I wanted a McChicken with tomato only. Simple right?

So she hands me the bag and I open up the sammich to find, lo and behold, lettuce and mayonnaise. I'm like, NO WAY. So my mom parks the car and takes it inside. THIRTY MINUTES LATER SHE RETURNS.

Turns out that when she gave it back and said tomato only, they handed her another McChicken with lettuce and mayonnaise. this happened about FOUR-FIVE TIMES. I can only assume they refunded her or something. Idk, I only remember being hungry for thirty minutes and eating my McChicken with an absolutely livid mother.

[Fazermint]

tay120n64 wrote:

Hilarious stuff

This made my day! And it's only 9:45 in the morning! Lawl

[Flamez]

You know what burns my ass?

Women.



life would be easier if I was gay

[Fazermint]

Flamez wrote:

You know what burns my ass? Women. life would be easier if I was gay

Life is like bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'll need a good hand. [/lame humor]

[tay120n64]

Fazermint wrote:

Life is like bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'll need a good hand. [/lame humor]

Lol, wut?

I guess that's a bridge we all cross when we COME to it? [Bah-Dum-PSSHH]

AAAAAAAAAAND, I'm out.

[Freedan]

I've never had trouble with fast food places. I don't go all that often though.

Once, at McDonald's, they gave me a free drink (some mochachinolattefrappe or whatever the hell they call it) because they accidentally made it for the previous guy's order (he never ordered one), and he left before they brought it over. They offered it to me, so I took it while I was waiting for my order.

The only minor gripe I have is from Subway (where I usually go), when they don't label the outside of the wrappers when I order subs for the family. That, plus they're all foreign; it took me a while to learn how to order there the first time I went, trying to understand them through their accent.

[inferiare]

Wait, so they're from New York? Maybe from Brooklyn or Manhattan?

[Fazermint]

tay120n64 wrote:

Fazermint wrote: Life is like bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'll need a good hand. [/lame humor] Lol, wut? I guess that's a bridge we all cross when we COME to it? [Bah-Dum-PSSHH] AAAAAAAAAAND, I'm out.

I mean the card game. Wait.. is it actually called Bridge nationwide...? Damn.

[tay120n64]

Fazermint wrote:

tay120n64 wrote: Fazermint wrote: Life is like bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'll need a good hand. [/lame humor] Lol, wut? I guess that's a bridge we all cross when we COME to it? [Bah-Dum-PSSHH] AAAAAAAAAAND, I'm out. I mean the card game. Wait.. is it actually called Bridge nationwide...? Damn.

Didn't realize you meant the card game (it's Bridge in the US). Either way, my joke still works

[Fazermint]

tay120n64 wrote:

Fazermint wrote: tay120n64 wrote: Fazermint wrote: Life is like bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'll need a good hand. [/lame humor] Lol, wut? I guess that's a bridge we all cross when we COME to it? [Bah-Dum-PSSHH] AAAAAAAAAAND, I'm out. I mean the card game. Wait.. is it actually called Bridge nationwide...? Damn. Didn't realize you meant the card game (it's Bridge in the US). Either way, my joke still works

Owkay. Then we're both funny as hell.

[psychokind]

1. find work in a mc donalds germany store with at least 5 workers
2. request the founding of a employee organization after your probation
3. tell them to go to the yellow press if they fire you
4. get couple 1000 € cash for shutting up and quitting
5. holidays