Sinners Who Deserve Punishment

tay120n64 · Thu Sep 13, 2007 3:39 pm

Listed below are the names of those who have sinned beyond redemption. Their sins are listed following, as are their suggested punishments. Should you know another who has sinned, please add his or her name, as well as their sin and suggested punishment to this thread. (Note: The following is a joke. Please do not take me seriously.)

Bill Gates
Sins
-Windows ME
-Windows XP
-Windows Vista
-Microsoft Xbox

Suggested Punishment
-The sin of the Xbox is forgiven due to the 360, but Vista alone is punishable by death. Or severe beating.

Jack Thompson
Sins
-Fighting to ban violent videogames, rather than simply restricting underage sales
-Flamming gamers on the internet without provocation
-Being a douchebag

Suggested Punishment
-Tie him down to a chair and force him to play Grand Theft Auto 3 and Mario's Early Years: Fun With Letters and ask which one he enjoyed more. Then throw a PS2 at his head.

Eiji Aonuma
Sins
-Tingle
-The Wind Waker

Suggested Punishment
-Banned from ever touching another Zelda game again, unless the Tingle RPG is cancelled. Oh, and he must allow gamers to destroy Tingle and he has to watch us do it. Alot.

Tetsuya Nomura
Sins
-Final Fantasy VII
-Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children
-Final Fantasy VII: Dirge of Cerberus
-Final Fantasy VII: Dirge of Cerberus Lost Episode
-Final Fantasy VII: Last Order
-Final Fantasy VII: Crisis Core
-Final Fantasy VII: Before Crisis
-Final Fantasy VII: Snowboarding
-Kingdom Hearts II

Suggested Punishment
-Can any punishment make up for the pointless plots of Advent Children and Kingdom Hearts II? How about the exploitation of Final Fantasy VII? No. No punishment is great enough. He goes free because his sins are TOO great.

Rumiko Takahashi
Sins
-Inuyasha Season 4
-Inuyasha Season 5
-Inuyasha Season 6
-No Inuyasha Season 7

Suggested Punishment
-Forced to live without food or water until she writes an episode(s) in which Naraku completely dies, the Shikon Jewel is destroyed, and Inuyasha and Kagome start dating.

Everyone at [adult swim]
Sins
-Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film for Theaters
-Aqua Teen Hunger Force Seasons 5 and up
-Harvey Birdman Season 3
-Frisky Dingo
-Assy McGhee
-12 Oz. Mouse
-Minoriteam
-Saul of the Mole Men
-Tim and Eric Awesome Show! Great Job!
-Cancelling Anime Saturdays
-Cancelling Perfect Hair Forever
-Cancelling Shin-Chan
-Not Cancelling Tom Goes to the Mayor
-The past six years of my life

Suggested Punishment
-Forced to watch their own shows while sober until they make something that isn't full of crap.

And the sinners were punished. And there was much rejoicing.

Moddex · Posted: Thu Sep 13, 2007 4:40 pm Post subject:

Amen man. Seriously. A lot of the stuff up there are some of the reasons why I don't watch TV much, if ever. Only time I want to watch TV is if there's something like Scrubs on Comedy Central, Daily Show, or Colbert Report. That's about it.

And for the games, god yes, I wish the damn extensions to FFVII would die in a horrible way. I got pissed as it was with how much over-hype the first FFVII got. (Come on, stop it at the first and only VII, don't branch in it cause it's like beating a decrepit horse.)

And Windows ME. Aww geez, need I SAY anything!?

Freedan · Posted: Thu Sep 13, 2007 5:17 pm Post subject:

Aonuma can't be banned from Zelda. If he had been, there would be no Twilight Princess.

I mean, there would be, but it would likely suck.

WW may not measure up to the usual formula, but you can't bat 1000 all the time. One mediocre game in a sea of awesomeness isn't a bad track record.

Suggesting Aonuma's banning is your sin, so your punishment is spending one day in the same room as Axe.

I know it's harsh, but it's the only way you'll learn.

chicken · Posted: Thu Sep 13, 2007 5:26 pm Post subject:

Bill Gates
Sins
-Windows ME
-Windows XP
-Windows Vista
-Microsoft Xbox

you forgot his worst sin... WINDOWS MILLENIUM!

and btw, XP wasnt THAT bad after all...

Manibrandr System · Posted: Thu Sep 13, 2007 6:47 pm Post subject:

Windows Vista is actually an awesome OS.

Posted: Thu Sep 13, 2007 7:29 pm Post subject:

I don't mind the spinoffs for the FF7 franchise. But honestly, if they're going to do spinoff games, they should do so for their other popular FF games (like FF6, or FF4 or SOMETHING.)

...however, I do demand more games with Vincent as the main character.

tay120n64 · Posted: Fri Sep 14, 2007 3:30 pm Post subject:

I remembered the names of the other FFVII games, so they're all up there now.

you forgot his worst sin... WINDOWS MILLENIUM!

and btw, XP wasnt THAT bad after all...

Uh, Windows ME is Millenium (ME=Millenium Edition)

Aonuma can't be banned from Zelda. If he had been, there would be no Twilight Princess.

I mean, there would be, but it would likely suck.

WW may not measure up to the usual formula, but you can't bat 1000 all the time. One mediocre game in a sea of awesomeness isn't a bad track record.

Suggesting Aonuma's banning is your sin, so your punishment is spending one day in the same room as Axe.

I know it's harsh, but it's the only way you'll learn.

Okay, so maybe I went a tad overboard with the Wind Waker, but seriously... A day with Axe? In the same room? For a whole day? Overkill.

Hammerit · Posted: Sat Sep 15, 2007 4:05 am Post subject:

tay120n64 wrote:
you forgot his worst sin... WINDOWS MILLENIUM!
Uh, Windows ME is Millenium (ME=Millenium Edition)

well ... if that aint bringing back horrifying memories. A friend called me a few years ago if I couldn't come to his place and fix his computer as it's doing strange things. Being a nice guy I tried to help ... but the only way to solve the problem was to kick that fuck off the damn computer and reinstall the system from anew ... with Windows 2k of course ^^. Before that day I've heard rumors about ME being ... the worst OS ever programmed, but hell I really did underestimate how much a O$ can actually be fucked up ô.Ô.

I think Windows ME wasn't mentioned in the list above, because no punishment could ever equalize what Windows ME did to mankind.

lucas_kelly11 · Posted: Sat Sep 15, 2007 11:55 pm Post subject:

I know this is a joke but how was the Xbox a sin?

Manibrandr System · Posted: Sun Sep 16, 2007 5:56 pm Post subject:

As horrible Windows ME was, it's STILL not as bad as Mac OS 8, oh my fucking God what a fucking atrocity.

tay120n64 · Posted: Sun Sep 16, 2007 8:53 pm Post subject:

I know this is a joke but how was the Xbox a sin?

Well, it kind of sucked as a system. It had a fair amount of power, and people who like to mod their systems had a lot of fun with it, but it just wasn't up to snuff. Microsoft had no idea how to make a console. everything was too huge. Remember the ginormous controller? If it weren't for Halo, the system would've never made it.

Manibrandr System · Posted: Mon Sep 17, 2007 9:54 am Post subject:

The controller is made big so you can hurt your camping coward friends with it.

The XBox is actually great to play with, I tested out the XBox version of Counter Strike and it was awesome. There's also the XBox version of Serious Sam which makes it kickass.

lucas_kelly11 · Posted: Tue Sep 18, 2007 7:10 am Post subject:

tay120n64 wrote:
I know this is a joke but how was the Xbox a sin?
Well, it kind of sucked as a system. It had a fair amount of power, and people who like to mod their systems had a lot of fun with it, but it just wasn't up to snuff. Microsoft had no idea how to make a console. everything was too huge. Remember the ginormous controller? If it weren't for Halo, the system would've never made it.

Yeah I agree it probably wasn't as good as the PS2 but it had some great games on it. The GC was more of a failure.

Miss Prime Blue · Posted: Wed Sep 19, 2007 12:11 pm Post subject:

I agree with you on the tingle thing, lol. But no, windwaker was good, it just didn't look 'omgz super cool graphixs lols' like everyone wanted it to.

Eiji Aonuma is vital to Zelda's production, though.

tay120n64 · Posted: Wed Sep 19, 2007 1:22 pm Post subject:

Well, it wasn't so much the graphics for me (I loved them!), rather it was the gameplay. the game was too easy, and there were too many sidequests. Oh, and the ending kinda sucked...