Comic's Corner

Jason Tandro · Sat Mar 07, 2009 12:00 pm

Okay people, here it is. A Terra-Earth joke contest. Whip out your funniest jokes and tell them here. One at a time, please!

I'll start with a personal favorite:

A man comes home to see his wife sitting in her chair in a very sexy nightie, holding a length of rope and some scarves.

"Tie me up," she purrs. "And you can do whatever you want."

So he tied her up and went golfing.

Blade · Posted: Sat Mar 07, 2009 12:53 pm Post subject:

I know alot of jokes, but I can't remember one single of them...

The only joke that comes to my mind is a quite bad one, pure black humor...

chicken · Posted: Sat Mar 07, 2009 4:02 pm Post subject:

this one just came into my mind:

a doctor goes into a grocery and says "i want to bake a cake" and the shopkeeper says "i got some cream for that"

gosh that was so terrible XDD

Freedan · Posted: Sat Mar 07, 2009 5:22 pm Post subject:

A blonde joke I heard a while ago:

A blonde lady and her boyfriend were watching the news on TV. There was a story about two Brazilian skydivers who were killed after being caught in the engine of a passing plane.

After hearing the story, the blonde started to cry. "It's so terrible!", she screamed, crying louder. "All those people dying in such a horrible way!"

She turned to her boyfriend and asked "how many is a Bra-zillion, anyway?"

Jason Tandro · Posted: Sat Mar 07, 2009 7:25 pm Post subject:

chicken wrote:this one just came into my mind:

a doctor goes into a grocery and says "i want to bake a cake" and the shopkeeper says "i got some cream for that"

gosh that was so terrible XDD

you botched the joke! It's a proctologist, not just any old doctor!

chicken · Posted: Sun Mar 08, 2009 3:49 am Post subject:

Jason Tandro wrote:
chicken wrote:this one just came into my mind:

a doctor goes into a grocery and says "i want to bake a cake" and the shopkeeper says "i got some cream for that"

gosh that was so terrible XDD
you botched the joke! It's a proctologist, not just any old doctor!

that joke actually exists? Oo i thought i was just creating it lol

Posted: Sun Mar 08, 2009 4:36 am Post subject:

Ok ok I got one. Got this from my coworker in a text message of all things. Highlight to see the answer, since I made it a bit harder to see.

What's the opposite of Christopher Reeves?

Christopher Walken.

Manibrandr System · Posted: Sun Mar 08, 2009 6:33 am Post subject:

LOL

Chris Walken is the man!

Here is one :

Q : What do you get when you cross a black with a mexican?
A : Someone who is too lazy to steal.

Freedan · Posted: Sun Mar 08, 2009 5:20 pm Post subject:

Why are there no Mexicans on Star Trek?

- Because even in the future, they won't be working.

chicken · Posted: Sun Mar 08, 2009 6:39 pm Post subject:

well now i got one as well:

Q: what do you get, when you cross an owl with a bungie cord?

A: my ass

(got that one from kung pow ^^)

EverPhoenix · Posted: Tue Mar 10, 2009 7:59 am Post subject:

heres something i found somewhat amusing from a sitcom. horribly paraphrased, but the punchline remains the same

doctor: im gonna prescribe you some pills, and you should be fine

patient: but i cant swallow pills

doctor: thats ok, the pills are suppository

patient: oh... what do i do with those?

doctor: remember what i told you to do with that magazine subscription you tried to sell me?

Azure Phoenix · Posted: Tue Mar 10, 2009 5:34 pm Post subject:

chicken wrote:(got that one from kung pow ^^)

That movie owns

Jason Tandro · Posted: Fri Mar 13, 2009 10:14 pm Post subject:

Men are like toilets. They are either dirty, unavailable, out-of-order or full of shit.

Women are disoriented. They don't know their place.

Gotta love sexist jokes!